If a raccoon family has ever tried to make your territory into their territory, you know the frustration of these Germans wondering what they are going to do about the “furry Blitzkrieg.”

Cornered raccoon takes a stand

There is even a parody on “99 Red Balloons” (I like the Goldfinger version better than Nena’s original.) named “99 Dead Raccoons.”  What makes that even more funny is that “99 Red Balloons” is an anti-war piece but “99 Dead Raccoons” is a declaration of total war against the animals Der Spiegel calls a “hissing animal with markings like a safecracker’s mask.”

These traps work with canned corn as bait.  But, then, what to do with that vicious beast when you come out in the morning and find him your prisoner?

At least the German writer does not blame us—the United States.  We get credit for the animal’s origins, but not for his arrival in Europe.  The Germans deny that Hermann Göring was personally responsible, as the British accused, calling the raccoons “Nazi invaders.”